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Your Impact Stays On My Mind.

If you say the word “impact” one too may times, it lose its..impact. Not really.

Today I got the chance to tell someone that his words stayed with me for years, and always will. I was a scared new mom, three and a half years ago. My baby hadn’t left my side since she was born 12 hours earlier, and she was being wheeled away by a nurse for a quick early morning pediatrician examination. They wanted to let me sleep. Yeah right! I waited anxiously for Scarlet to return, and I was convinced they were going to tell me something was wrong with her. Several hours later, from what it seemed (was really only a few minutes), the examining pediatrician brought her back and told me she was “healthy, vigorous and beautiful.” And those words became my Facebook status and they went in the baby book!

The kids go to a practice with several pediatricians and nurses. We like this place because without depending on just one doctor or two, the kids can be seen last minute and at odd times, if need be. Scarlet’s “first” doctor, described above, belongs to this practice. Her “second” doctor who discharged her from the hospital with “Enjoy your baby” handwritten in the “Instructions” portion of the discharge paperwork, also belonged to this practice, but has since retired. Scarlet and Des go to other doctors in the office, and they stay with the same ones as consistently as possible. And we love that.

This morning got off to a weird start. After very vivid and strange dreams about many people, Des woke up at 4:00 am for nursing. His breathing sounded hoarse and labored. I didn’t panic because he settled back into a silent sleep, and I know I tend to overreact with him and I could almost hear Cassidy’s voice say to me, “It’s ok. He’s ok.” So back to sleep we went. And through the busy morning of taking Scarlet to school and getting ready to have new friends over, he kept coughing these weird coughs. Sounded like a seal or dog barking. Some of you may already know what this means. I canceled the plans, picked up Scarlet and took Des to the doctor. Croup is the diagnosis! Mild croup, luckily, with no need for medication.

The doctor we saw today, at this last minute sick child appointment, was the first doctor to ever examine Scarlet! I hadn’t seen him since. He told me I looked vaguely familiar. I told him about what he said to me, three and a half years ago, and about how I wrote it in her baby book and it made me happier than anything could. He thanked me for telling him that.

Then I thanked him for thanking me. It was a very thankful appointment.

He told me how important it was to see Des acting happy and normal..ish, and not distressed. So I told him about 4:00 am and how after hoarse breathing, I decided to co-sleep with Des just to keep an eye on him for the remaining few hours of sleep we had. And once he figured out he was next to me, it became a party to him. He started making funny faces and blowing raspberries, and my personal favorite – talking with his tongue hanging out of his mouth so that he sounded like a cartoon character. I think to have that kind of elevated sense of humor, at seven months old, and at 4:00 am, you have to be feeling somewhat all right. So now we wait for this illness to pass. I hope it’s not a brutal one..

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(Ever The Thinker)

Oh, and speaking of impact but not the kind you feel the need to share with the given person, I had so many vivid dreams last night that I found myself clamping my mouth shut while passing other parents and their children in the preschool parking lot. Something tells me that at eight in the morning, with cranky kids in tow, no one should have to hear that weird mom (me) say, “Oh, hi! Totally had a dream about you last night. Everything was great. Let’s have a playdate.” Luckily I have a filter, sometimes. I’m just always curious to know that if someone was in my dream, was I in their dream too?

Impact.

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It’s what it’s all about sometimes.

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