I Got A Room At The Top Of The World Tonight.

Every now and then, I write to music. Should you want to read this to the song I wrote it to, here you go:

It’s Spring Break this week. And Easter. And Athena’s five-month birthday. Oh, and she lost a tooth on Easter Eve!

So there was this awkward collision on Saturday night in which the Dog Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny may or may not have met at our house in the middle of the night. I’d like to believe that they met and shared a snack around our dining room table, under the watchful gaze of Han Solo. That’s what I’d like to believe. What did they talk about during the night, do you think?

They probably said that we’re nerds. Nerds with good snacks.

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There’s also an awkward collision of leftover winter air and warm spring fronts. The mornings? Frigid. The afternoons? Heavenly. I’m spending a lot of time up in my office, enjoying the spring breezes that occasionally make their way up here. I’m working on a giant data entry project again, and this might be my biggest one yet in the five years of doing this. I’m also working on my sister’s engagement photos, and when I am able, I work on my personal photos. I’m backed up by the hundreds!

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I’m also nursing a two day crying hangover, after being overwhelmed by life on Friday night. This is why I don’t cry a lot. Sometimes I worry I won’t ever stop. The next morning we somehow made it to the Easter Bunny breakfast, with its lackluster food, and then enjoyed a breezy train ride around the park, then took a break for lunch, and then went to the insane egg hunt.

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As I sat down among my recent photos, I saw a common theme – bird’s eye views of adorableness going on while I’m clearly working, because my photos are taken from my second story office. This makes me sad, to see adorableness from a bird’s eye view. Then I realize I’m lucky to see such beauty and that I set my own work and hours, so I can just race downstairs and embrace it all, should I choose. And I chose it. I do choose it. I choose to embrace the adorableness, when at all possible.

And this is what I see when I peek down over the wooden railing:

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“I got someone who loves me tonight
I got over a thousand dollars in the bank
And I’m all right
Look deep in the eyes of love
Look deep in the eyes of love
And find out what you were looking for”
— Tom Petty

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  1. You have a whole lot of cuteness going on in that house! Athena and Cassidy…so adorable! And that picture of Scarlet and Des on the couch…what a treasure! The Easter egg hunt looks fun…we actually used to do something like that at our house. Maybe not quite so many kids, but a lot. A ton of kids. It was crazy. And my kids have great memories of it. It was a seriously big production for me every year. It was kind of sad when we stopped.

    1. That sounds like such fun! We got invited to a home-based one and we wanted to go but couldn’t. This one is at the local park and it’s as crazy as Northampton gets. Which is not so crazy after a life spent in New Jersey and San Francisco, but it’s still crazy!
      I do it for the memories!

  2. Aww, such cute pictures of your little one’s at the Easter egg hunt! I love the sweet photos of everyone sleeping. There’s something so innocent and organic about catching someone sleep. I always try to get a few of my son every now and then, because it just warms my heart!

    1. Aw! Babies sleeping! Cutest thing on earth. Babies, puppies and kittens sleeping. Or any baby animals. Even older kids look younger when they sleep.
      Hope you had a wonderful weekend!

  3. It’s so cute seeing all of them from afar. In fact, I think I’d love to have your office spot right now! 😀 We never did anything for Easter yesterday, I had to prep for work after 2 weeks of being on leave. Reiko watched a couple of videos on Youtube though. It’s nice to see Scarlet & Des enjoying egg hunting!

    1. Well Scarlet enjoyed egg hunting! Des didn’t really get it! He just stood there looking stunned. I realized that’s how I feel about the mad rush too. Luckily the two and under crowd isn’t the nuttiest. The 9-10 crowd? I was scared.

  4. Oh my goodness! This is the first time that I’m seeing the dog. Sooooo cute! I love it! I love your pictures from up top. Des and Scarlet are too funny. I’ve missed you and your posts so much. It’s great to be back and finally catching up with you. 🙂

        1. Well our first one was two and under so I did help with that one! However for 3-4, parents were NOT allowed in and so many went. And they were MUCH more cutthroat than the kids!

  5. I love the one with Des sleeping yet still clutching the lollipop! So many good ones. I also give you a lot of credit for going to those huge egg hunts! They make me cry for different reasons 🙂

    1. I think he was awake but fake crying because Scarlet wouldn’t leave him alone! Does that make it worse? haha.
      These egg hunts are nuts but it’s just so quick and it was a nice day that we went for it. I couldn’t believe my own stamina to be honest!

  6. I get hives just thinking about that egg hunt. TOO many people in a tiny space! And oh, the competitive side of people!

    I love your view!

    I know you’re backed up on photos and in the middle of a huge project, but I want you to know that you CAN DO IT! You’ll get through this gauntlet of crazy! And I meant what I said via text. We’re around this week. We can come and entertain the troops so you can sneak up to your space and work!

    1. The good thing about the egg hunt is that we’re not allowed in there! (except for the two and under one) So I just sat back and watched on a beautiful day! Although we had also done a train ride and the Easter Bunny breakfast and we weren’t having a great weekend as of yet..as you can imagine. Crying hangovers and all.
      Athena loved it, though!
      Thank you for the offer. What will save me this time is that there’s not a short deadline for the data entry. I just want to do it fast because..um…that’s a lot of money for lenses/blog conferences. However it will probably be awhile!

    1. It was NUTS, but in that Northampton, MA way and not in the NYC/SF way that I got used to over time. So for an anxious person who doesn’t love crowds? Not bad, not bad!
      Thanks for liking my candids! They were FUN!

  7. Oh my goodness! Those pictures from upstairs are to die for! The one of Athena and Cassidy sleeping- too cute!!! And I really like the term ‘crying hangover.’ I’ve often said that I think I am allergic to my tears. I really feel awful after I have cried…

    1. It’s so weird! It’s not usually this bad but my stomach didn’t feel settled but I was so hungry so I didn’t even have dinner until 11:00pm! It was fine, though.
      And the next day? Too much bright sunshine and I NEVER think that. It was a sunglasses day.

  8. You kids always make me smile and love all the photos of them here today. Spring Break is officially over for us today, while your is just beginning. Seriously, I am not ready to let it go though and had a hard time coming back to reality with even blogging today. I loved having some much needed time off at the end of the week and thinking I may take a day or two off more often and just let it be, because it was honestly liberating to not think of my blog, comment or worry over my stats. Oh and I love Tom Petty. Kevin and I actually just said if he came to Jones Beach for a summer concert this year, we would so have gone to see him 🙂

    1. Tom Petty at Jones Beach! Should that happen, count me in!! (or would that be weird to crash your date like that?)
      Cassidy and I may have our first night away this weekend for our anniversary. My mind can barely comprehend it! And of course, logistics are more complex now with a dog in the mix. We have to learn how to do this, though!

  9. I love your bird’s eye view. How wonderful that you can peak on what is happening downstairs and choose to join in.
    I am a crier. But if I have had a big cry right before bed – like if we watch a really sad movie – I always have a terrible headache the next day.

    1. Oh yes. I had a BIG cry when I was in college and adjusting to those changes. I woke up the next morning and my roommate asked me if I had done drugs the night before!
      Umm..no! That’s all natural.

  10. That is quite a view! 🙂 That first picture of Scarlet and Des together – not sure if they are hugging or wrestling, but it’s adorable!

    1. haha! TOTALLY wrestling, Lisa. He was just trying to chill on the floor and she thought it was so cute (which IS endearing) that she kept calling him “gush gush baby” and tickling him.
      She sounded like me, to be honest.

    1. Oh, James. The never-ending story, really. I straighten it out 17 times before dinner and by bedtime, it’s nuts again. Cassidy will have Scarlet help him pick up the room before she goes to bed and I’ll just sit there..kinda rudely..but in my defense, I had already done it 17 times that day!
      Cassidy is a very clean person. I try to keep up with him.

  11. I totally agree, you have a lot of adorableness going on there…even from a bird’s eye view…and the egg hunt does look insane. Blessed life, girl.

    1. Blessed life.. that may be my mantra when I do tend to lose it by the end of the week.
      It’s really cute. I peek over a lot and even right now, it’s adorable! If I keep looking, I’ll never be able to work because I’ll just keep taking photos.

  12. These are great pictures. I took a ton over this past week and I am way behind on my editing as well. I still did an egg hunt with my kids (we do one in the back yard every year) even though they don’t believe anymore it is still tons of fun – and we don’t have crowds to compete with. We also have great memories of going to Michelle’s hunt…lots of fun! Sometimes that birds eye view gives us the space to appreciate everything. Sometimes it makes me realize I need to get in there are reconnect.

    1. Michelle was telling me she used to do a big egg hunt but doesn’t anymore! She may have to go to your house! It’s weird because Des is pre-believing in things and Scarlet is right in the thick of it. It’s so weird to tell them such stories, but I love it too.

  13. Sweet T, I am with you on the emotional roller coaster all the way through the post & LOVE the photos as usual, excellent. My daughter says you can take her photo too when yo meet us…LOL. She’s itching for D & S. XO. ~A~

  14. You chose that house well! When I’m at my dad’s, I look down from the second story landing to catch a tableaux of kids at play. It’s the best feeling.

    1. That was how my childhood home was. My mom had a studio on the THIRD floor of our house and it overlooked the woods, and the living room below. She could see our big white dog and all five of us..goofing off, no doubt.
      I’m so glad to have that element in my adult home. It means..a lot.

  15. Athena and Cassidy stole the show today! Although I am quite tempted to caption the photo of Des pointing at his read end 🙂 My son did an easter egg hunt at school and since he never gets candy, he is almost overwhelmed by how much is in the house. He only gets minuscule pieces though–this might last till the summer.

    1. haha! You are always free to caption away. And I didn’t even notice that he was pointing there! Way too funny! Was he telling me about a dirty diaper? Was he trying to blame the dog for something he did? What do you think?

      And yes, candy lasts a LONG time around here!

    1. I saw your post and I get it! This was mellow as far as life goes, but a lot of my friends did say that they skipped it because the idea of it gave them hives! Ha! I hate insanity and crowds but it was outdoors on a beautiful day in a giant field so as long as I know I have space..I’m ok with crowds.

  16. A few years ago I started crying. And it went on for years. It’s not as bad now, but it still sneaks up on me. It’s like deer. By the time you see the, it’s too late. And where there’s one…

    Hang in there, those ‘cry-it-out-Fridays’ are cleansing.

    1. Did it.. break from time to time? No 24/7 crying, right?
      I guess sometimes your heart just splits wide open and it takes some time to cope with that, however good or bad it is in the long run.
      I choose to believe it’s good.

  17. Cassidy must be having a good dream (or he knows you’re taking the picture!) because he’s smiling in the first picture of him and Athena on the couch! The weather looks absolutely perfect for an Easter Egg Hunt. I haven’t done one of those in years!

    1. ha!
      He was clearly dreaming about me, right?
      The weather was nice! It was cool and breezy but nice. Today is supposed to be 72 or so. I can barely contain my excitement about it!

  18. Aww! Such cute photos. I love the one of Scarlet and Des on the couch. I sometimes have a hard time of getting photos of my kids. As soon as they see me with the camera they come running towards me trying to take it away. I even bought them their own kids camera and it has not helped very much.

    1. Both kids can give me a lot of trouble with photos. I have to bribe them or sneak them, and sometimes that leads to disaster too. I always think it’s so unfair because I’m a photographer and I want to practice on my kids!

  19. I’m still listening to the song as I just soak in your words, your moments, your window to your world. I always seem to immediately fall into this stillness when I am here… you create such an incredible ambiance, that it always slows me down and softens my pace to find beauty in contemplation and contentedness. Your gift does that, Tamara. And your lens- revealing such precious loves and glorious moments? Who can’t be deeply touched by those?

    I adore you.

    1. I adore you! I swear I look so forward to your comments. They’re just like..therapy.
      I’m glad you listened to the song too – it totally made me write the post! It would have been a different post with a different title if I had just had a different song come on Pandora..

  20. It sounds like you are achieving a great balance of birds eye view and being RIGHT THERE for all the cuteness – an enviable position, for sure! But that’s not to say that it’s not overwhelming sometimes!

    1. Absolutely overwhelming, and absolutely an enviable position at times! My mom used to have her perch (art studio) in a similar place in our childhood house.

  21. I will always listen to Tom Petty when it’s offered! Heck yeah!

    And I feel bad about this same thing sometimes — that mom is taking the pictures and not IN the pictures. But you know – someone has to capture the memories too. And they know I am capturing them (you can tell by all the discarded photobombs) — they know I am Here. In just a different role. There is lots of wrestling on carpets and tickle fights and kitchen dances that fills the empty spaces and gaps. Contrary to what I’ve been told to do: I can’t Make Every Moment Matter. that’s impossible. But I can capture a lot of them. Treasures to preserve.

    And those times when they gather around my lap around my laptop and look back at all the photos I have taken, and we laugh and see how far we’ve come from: it’s completely worth it.
    “tell me again mama about the time I crawled into the dishwasher!”
    And I will. Always.

    1. I like that. I can’t make every moment matter. And I can’t photograph every moment either. It’s always some weird balancing act, but I seem to dig it.
      Glad you took the Tom Petty! He was out there for the taking! And this song came on Pandora, or else this would have been a totally different post with a totally different feel!

  22. The bird’s eye view of adorableness is wonderful. While we may feel guilty for stepping away from it all, at least we are still close by. It’s amazing to be able to stay close. And we had an awkward meeting on Christmas Eve one year between the tooth fairy and Santa. I think they had a good time, especially with the snacks we left.

    1. Oh, do you think Santa shared his Christmas cookies with the Tooth Fairy? Ours was the dog Tooth Fairy and we’re not sure if it’s a dog..or a fairy. Or both?
      Raising kids is confusing.

  23. Confession: I found a few dog baby teeth when our puppy lost them, and I put them with my kids’ baby teeth (I have a special box for that).
    I so get the thing about crying and not being able to stop – life is sometimes pretty overwhelming. But yay for Spring and sunny breezy afternoons! xox

    1. Athena says thanks! She thinks five months is pretty awesome. I just keep hoping she’s nearly full grown because I think I like her small!

    1. ha, yes! They’re nuts too. We went to a calm one last week in which the hosts counted the kids and then told us how many eggs each kid got. And then everyone got a prize. It was so nice!

  24. lmao the photos of you looking down and they’re all napping is just too awesome. How sweet 🙂 Sunday Fun Day! What a great time it looks like you all had, minus Athena losing a tooth but it happens 😉 Have a great one Tamara! -Iva

    1. True, those puppy teeth have to go! I just hope the ones that grow in its places aren’t too sharp! It is funny that everyone is always napping and I’m always working!

  25. I love the view you have from your office! I hope to have something similar one day in my house, when we get to having it! Adorable photos and lots of cuteness; beats any “real” office in my opinion.

  26. That is the most insane egg hunt I have ever seen!! That’s crazy that they just let everyone loose at the same time. I love the birds’ eye view pics. So much going on in your home. I love all the innocence you captured!

    1. It is insane. Luckily they go by age so it’s really only two ages at a time getting let loose. The 9-10-year-olds sounded insane. And it takes place in the woods! I’ve never actually watched it, though. I can hear it a mile away!

  27. I love your birds-eye pictures, they really have captured some great moments. I get being sad that you can’t be in the moments, but you are right that you are truly lucky to have those moments in your life.

    1. So true. I can just go embrace these moments at any point. I do actually time myself for data entry so it’s always funny when someone needs me during that time. I get all huffy and make a big show about turning off the timer!

  28. You have a wonderful view, Tamara – up high to watch it all, and then just a flight of stairs away from living in it. The best of both worlds!

    1. That’s how I like to look at it! The best of both worlds. Sometimes I just look down and only see the giant mess that is the living room..

  29. I love your birds-eye view – such awesome subjects to look at!!!
    I’m sorry that you have been suffering from a crying hang-over – I hate that feeling because it just lingers sometimes!
    I hope the nice weather today helps!!

    1. I guess that’s why I hesitate to really cry. The body needs it but the body doesn’t handle it well. What gives?
      Today’s weather is exquisite!

  30. I love your birds’ eye view but I also understand the sentiment of being an observer versus participant. You have your work cut out for you! Data, edit, edit…oh my! And I must agree, the egg hunt breakfast is completely lackluster! When we arrived at for pancakes at our hunt, there was no line and the guy in front of the griddle said “oh you want pancakes?” then pulled out a stack of 30 pancakes (out of nowhere) and said “they’re cold now.” Uhm…let’s just say the flavor did not make up for temperature. Terrible sell. And btw, I loved reading your fb status over the weekend on why Des won, Scarlet & Athena all won the egg hunt.

    1. I’m laughing about your experience too. Why can’t there be a good Easter Bunny breakfast? Yay for cold pancakes! Cold, clammy pancakes!
      At ours it was powdered eggs. The hash browns were quite good, though.
      I’m still dreaming about it.
      I’m glad we’re FB friends!

  31. I too love your birds eye view and all the adorableness that you capture. Crying hangovers are the worst but is it possible to get one without crying? Because I think that I have one from bottling it up. I’ve missed your photos and words over the past week!

    1. I think it is possible! I can get a sore throat or headache from inner emotional pressure. Not often, but there’s no mistaking it!
      I missed your words and photos too! I really got greeted by some good ones this morning.

  32. I actually cannot write to music, it distracts me so much that I start writing the song, LOL!!!!!!! Just like I cannot really write when the TV is on either. When I leave blog comments and such too, it has to be SILENT! ha ha! I need to FOCUS 😉 — ADD much?? Oh yes

    And I have a proposition for you – COME TAKE MY HEAD SHOTS and photos for Whitney and I for DUDE FOOD!!! You’re just so good, it’s not even funny !!

    1. That’s a great proposition and my answer is YES!!
      Especially when we get you auditioned for Food Network Star..like..immediately!
      I have never missed an episode. So I have totally watched you on TV. Nutty.

      1. Tara and I were on the BURGER BASH episode – I voted for Nikki Dinky’s burger – so flipping good! Actually, I remember I went up for a burger, she told me I was really pretty and BAM – instant fan! And we still keep in touch! 🙂 She’s got a YouTube channel so we cross promote!

  33. Wow! That’s an amazing amount of kiddos at the Easter Bunny breakfast and egg hunt! Is that something your town puts on? Love those precious pictures of your loves! So cute!

    1. Our local park does it and it’s HUGE! They’re such a fun park. They do some great fireworks although I’ve never been brave enough to go. I generally don’t like crowds, but in the middle of a bright, sunny day with lots of open air, I do ok!

  34. Awwww….such sweet naptime pictures. I love pictures of the kids sleeping, though mine will rarely sleep if the sun’s shining around them. And that Easter egg hunt is no joke! Poor T only got two eggs because she wasn’t fast enough out of the gate this year. I’d love to hear more about your work at home experiences. Do you work and watch the kids at the same time?

    1. Last year, Scarlet just froze like a deer in headlights. This year she was all about it, but Des froze! Well..he’s only one.
      The work at home thing is nuts, Leslie. Just nuts. I have to get the grandparents to watch them a lot, and I work a lot at night and on weekends.

  35. I miss Tom Petty’s music. I used to love it.

    We usually go to an insane egg hunt like that in my Mom’s neighborhood every year. It’s NUTS! That picture tells the tale!

    Athena seems to be fitting in just right… 🙂

    1. I’ve always l loved Tom Petty!
      And it’s funny but now it seems like Athena’s always been here. Funny how that happens so fast. It’s only been a month..yesterday, I think!

    1. ha! I’m NOT very laid back and I didn’t bat an eye at that one. Strange! I don’t like crowds at all.
      I like to imagine that all of the magical creatures love it here! Santa has never been here, though. We do Christmas in New Jersey.

  36. What a sweet family!
    I sometimes get overwhelmed by life. I was feeling it yesterday. The only thing stopping the tears was the presence of Sam’s mom. And then old friends came over for dinner and it really helped.

  37. I love your birds’ eye view, and would love to have a loft! I’m thinking I need a better workspace as I’m tucked away in a corner of the dining room. Maybe if I had a birds’ eye view I would be more productive…or maybe not. 😉

  38. The best part of the egg-hunt chaos? The thumbs up from the kid in the mohawk.

    Grace asked what would happen if she lost a tooth on Christmas Eve. Talk about collision of night magic.

    1. I wish Mohawk Boy was in focus. I didn’t have a good lens that day. Boo! Maybe he won the golden ticket?
      I love collisions of night magic. That should be a book or movie title. Or blog post?

    1. Funny, because I was just commenting on your recent post and now you’re here at the same time!
      Good cries are weird – so cleansing but they feel so awful during and right after.

  39. Wow, that is one CRAZY egg hunt. Glad your kids enjoyed it though! I love that you named this post, “view from the top of the world” and posted photos to go with it. I love the photos of the napping family, and the sunlight hitting them just right. It really is nice to be able to join the craziness when you want, and leave it when you want.

  40. Big hugs for your friday night XOXOX I am sorry. My anxiety affects me differently I shut down and sleep. Or run around manic. But I am always here with an understanding shoulder. Well I guess that is tough via e-mail. Nonetheless I understand.
    Love your easter photo!

    1. Thank you! That is awesome to hear. Email really can work.
      Anxiety TOTALLY shuts me down. And then leads to a big crying fest. And that leads to a headache. And then, often, I’m ok.

  41. You photos of everyone napping are so peaceful! Looks like you have some comfy couches too!.I like your view. That looks like quite an egg hunt – I hope your Easter was better than the meal!

  42. Oh my, so adorable. The bird’s eye view is beautiful. You’re a mama bird keeping watch over her little ones. You’re so lucky to have that ability when you’re working. Although I imagine I would be easily distracted, I wouldn’t want to work!

    1. I’m TOTALLY a mama bird. I guess the living room is the nest. I’m totally looking over all the time to make sure they’re behaving, or that I’m not missing insane cuteness.
      Working during the day is really hard. I mostly work at night.

    1. Thanks! She’s a total clown. She has a submissive personality which is a nice change from every dominant dog I’ve ever had, but I always expect her to be more mischievous than she really is.

  43. aww, that’s a great view, my office is a windowless room with dim lighting. probably better that way – less distractions! btw, that is a lot of kids egg hunting.

  44. Nobody sleeps in my house unless they are drugged.
    True story.
    I’m sorry that you cried on Friday. I wish that I lived near you so that I could give you real hugs and chocolate chip cookies from that wee store you talked about. You could have all of them because I hate chocolate. True. xoxo

    1. Really? What kinds of drugs for everyone?
      I often wish you lived near me. Your weather would still suck but we could share cookies and ice cream, non-chocolate of course.
      Or I could move near you.
      But if you moved here, I have a friend who hates chocolate and she makes salted caramel everything.

  45. What a wonderful view! Your place reminds me so much of the cabin that the hubby and I stayed in on our honeymoon, in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. WOW! All of the kiddies! That looks like such a fun and wonderful day for an Easter Egg hunt! Love the pics of Athena! She is so pretty. The one of Des sprawled out on Scarlet just completely warms my heart! Hope you are having an amazing week, my friend! Hugs!

  46. Wow! That Easter egg hunt is massive! I can’t imagine how long it would take to hide eggs for all those kids!

    I am loving your snoozing photos, especially Cassidy and Athena asleep together. I didn’t think your family could get any cuter, but they totally did!

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