Currently, Don’t Be Afraid to Catch Feels

Blogging is a funny beast sometimes, isn’t it?

I mean, I came here to do one thing – which was to write – but I found so many strange and wonderful connections instead. I found myself. I was super lost, but we’re always lost and found, lost and found, throughout life. I always think that as long as I can come here once or twice a week to say “hi” simply as myself, it’s all ok. And what can I say? I’m super muddled. I feel like I’ve been that way for a long time. Maybe this is just my life now. Maybe this is just me now. Muddled, occasionally haggard, sometimes glowing, always busy, and able to boomerang back. Sometimes the words come and sometimes it’s pulling teeth and if we’re being honest, I didn’t think there was a chance in heck I’d come here and have anything to say.

Yet, here I am – barely stringing words together. Sometimes it’s fun to see where this goes.

Now, it’s Currently Time! Feel free to write your own sometime!

Currently, I’m..

Reading: Seriously, nothing. I had an overdue library book for about two months that wound up being packed up in a box before our renovations started. I have so many books to read. You know how with some things in life, you have to hear a click to be sure? Like a seatbelt. That’s how my brain works. If there’s a click, I’m full speed ahead. If there’s no click, and maybe just some halfway one, I’m pretty much useless. I can’t do the simplest thing – like go into the basement and find a book to read. My brain is my biggest opponent. Ridiculous. The click metaphor works for all aspects of my life. LAME.

Planning: Ooh, pick me! Planning! I’m sort of terrible at it, but maybe the seatbelt clicked for this one. We’re planning our annual Disney World trip in January! Before that, we are surprising the kids with a Polar Express train ride in upstate NY (I mean.. the North Pole). There might be a hotel stay or two in all of that. I’m also co-planning.. you know.. our entire HOUSE as it gets ripped apart and put back together. Remember when the renovations start/stopped? Now they’re full speed ahead.

Stressing: Stressing? Me? Ok, you got me there. I’m always in a weird whirlwind of sweating the small stuff, and then not sweating the small stuff, but it always comes back around because I’m hard-wired in the DNA to stress the small stuff. I actually think it’s the big stuff, but don’t tell anyone. Currently, I’m more busy with work than I’ve ever been. Remember last year and earlier this year, when I was doing photography, blogging, and big boxes of data entry surveys? Yeah, that was child’s play. I’m so busy right now with blogging, photography, and my new Visual Content Management job (QA) that I actually can’t breathe sometimes. It’s a wonder I’m writing this because I have seven photo shoots to edit. Also, I stress about the apocalypse and marriage and parenting and my mid-section, but who has time to write and read that one? Not it.

Wishing: I make wishes and prayers when I’m panicked and it doesn’t happen often, but when it does, WHAM. Let’s talk about wishes, though. They’re usually made from a mid-level and sent to above. You follow me here? Prayers are made from down below – just to get to mid level. Does that make sense? I wish for things to make sense. And world peace. Health.

Feeling: Like I shouldn’t be afraid to catch feels. And in my strange inability to feel things sometimes, I wonder if there’s a way not to force the feels, but to coax them out. Last year I couldn’t feel the holiday spirit, except maybe in glimpses. I wasn’t in the waterfall of the feels, if you know what I mean. And if you don’t..let’s go right to the next one and you will:

Listening: To this little number:

Eating: Nothing at the moment but I stole a Hickory Farms Salted Caramel Chocolate (from myself) a few minutes ago. And I have my eye on the Cookie Butter OREOs upstairs (finally found them!) and having Cassidy make stovetop popcorn. YES.

Wearing: A super cool Star Wars shirt and burgundy pants.

Loving: That I was there on the last day my favorite seasonal ice cream stand was open for 2017. And when I mentioned that Scarlet was away, they gave me a free quart of cotton candy ice cream to give to my kid! Ah! I’m also loving the feel of the warmth from the pellet stove, the smell of coffee, paychecks, and all the possibilities I’ve been discovering about myself and my capabilities. I hope it’s upward mobility.. forever. That’s a reasonable request that I haven’t chosen to ignore!

Name that reference (above)!

Hoping: Just insert a bunch of political and weather and health things right here. That about does it for today.

Pick one of these verbs and tell me what you’re doing currently.

About Tamara

Tamara is a professional photographer at http://tamaracamera.com/, a mama of two, a writer/blogger at http://tamaracamerablog.com and a nearly professional cookie taster. She has been known to be all four of those things at all hours of the day and night. She is a very proud contributor to the book, The Mother Of All Meltdowns. http://themotherofallmeltdowns.com, as well as Stigma Fighters Anthology (volume 1), and The HerStories Project: So Glad They Told Me. She is also a proud Community Lead/QA Reader with Sway, and a regular contributor to the SoFab Food blog, and the Target Made Me Do It blog. After two cross country moves, due to her intense Bi-Coastal Disorder, she lives with her husband, daughter, son, dog, cat, and 11 chickens in glorious western Massachusetts.


Comments

Currently, Don’t Be Afraid to Catch Feels — 15 Comments

  1. Loved the awesome update and been awhile since I did a currently post on my own blog. But just been a bit crazy here, as well. Like you though I haven’t been reading as much. Finally finished one book last week and slowly reading the next. Oh and planning for our Disney trip, too. But we leave in 7 days now. Seriously, so excited for that that I could burst. You’d think we didn’t go to Disney in the summer, but still just love it there so much as you know. Happy Friday now, my friend!!! 🙂

  2. I love reading posts like this. I have been a hot mess, and so writing one has not been on my to-do list. Things are getting better though 🙂 That picture of the hole in your house with a tarp is awesome! I despise renovations, but the end result will be fantastic I am sure.

  3. You have SO much going on right now, but it sounds like you got it in control.! How exciting that you are doing Content Management too! I would love to know what that Cotton Candy ice cream tastes like! I cannot wait to see how your bedroom turns out (I am assuming you will share – LOL). Have a wonderful weekend Tamara!

  4. When I saw your headline I was worried with all the terrible news lately about sexual harassment, but I guess catch a feel is not the same as cop a feel 🙂

  5. So many things going on in your life right now, what a great way to sum it up. Renovations can be very stressful and I cannot imagine having to edit so many photos at one time. Also cotton candy ice cream sounds so very yummy!

  6. I love love love currently lists. Like, I kind of live for them actually. it gives me a nice glimpse into the thoughts behind the blogger and what makes her tick….

    or click. I like that metaphor. I get it, too… I always feel like for me, it’s a big ball of wire. One thing connected to the next thing, and I unearth some boxes and it’s like WHOOOSH a windfall. Everything at once. I have a hard time compartmentalizing. Do you, too?

    I love that Star Wars sweatshirt. And also this Waterfall song. Seriously everything Sia touches is just golden, eh? Also that damn “don’t be afraid to catch feels” song. It’s everywhere and so catchy and bouncy. Also free cotton candy ice cream? Where do I sign up?

    *HUGS* May things start to slow down a bit (but not so much because I feel like we crave the constant go go a bit, eh?). XOXO

  7. I’m loving the update and I’m super excited about your Disney trip and the North Pole too. You’ve got to come to CO where we have a real North Pole, complete with a real US post office that has an official North Pole stamp. The kids would LOVE it.

  8. Love the currently update. I’m feeling the opposite right now – kind of bored and in a weird place with not enough challenging things to do. I need to come be your assistant!

  9. Tamara, I just don’t even know how you DO. IT. ALL. You just amaze me. Truly.

    I’m currently sick. Missing my girl’s swim meet two hours away at Miami U. I woke up with some nasty stomach bug. But don’t fret- not the throw up kind… if you know what I mean. oy. I’m hoping I can recover quick to hike it up there early tomorrow morning. (In the snow? UGH) She has several more events and I’m heartbroken I’m not there!

    Polar express?!! I LOVE that you do the coolest stuff with your kids. And Disney in January? AWESOME!!

    And what is this Visual content management job? My gosh, do you sleep? You are on FIRE…

    Keep burning bright. It’s a beautiful thing- YOU are a beautiful thing.

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